After the end of a relationship between the parents, the child has the right to maintain contact with both parents. This applies both to the parent with parental authority and to the parent without it. In other words, even if a parent does not have custody of the child, that parent still retains the right to spend time with their child.
Since the outbreak of the Covid-19 virus and the government-imposed regulations—which essentially require people to stay home as much as possible—I have been approached several times by divorced parents (mostly mothers) of minor children asking whether they must adhere to the visitation schedule under the current circumstances. This is reason enough to shed some light on this topic.
Unfortunately, there is no one-size-fits-all answer. In addressing this question, I would like to first emphasize that the visitation schedule—especially if it has been issued by the court—remains in effect. The coronavirus crisis is not a reason to keep children from their other parent. The guiding principle is that children should experience as few negative effects as possible from a divorce or separation, even during times of Covid-19.
Parents must, of course, take into account the government-imposed rules during the pandemic, as well as the specific circumstances of their situation. Every case is different, and I advise parents primarily to coordinate with each other on the possibilities available in their case. For children, it is generally best if the agreed or imposed visitation schedule continues. After all, even during the Covid-19 pandemic, children retain their right to contact both parents.
However, practical challenges may arise that make visitation difficult—for example, if parents are restricted from going outside on the day of the handover due to local regulations. Another scenario could be if the child or the other parent shows potential health symptoms. In such cases, it may be prudent to keep the child at home.
It is also possible that children themselves do not want to visit the other parent due to the uncertainty and stress caused by the Covid-19 situation. This is understandable: everything is different now, and fear of the virus can affect children as well as adults. In these cases, parents have a special role in reassuring their children. Show extra understanding, patiently answer their questions, and engage in open conversation with them.
I also recommend not escalating disagreements with your ex-partner regarding compliance with the visitation schedule. Remember that children generally need both parents (emotionally), especially for their development, even during Covid-19.
The coronavirus and resulting lockdown do not, in themselves, justify stopping the visitation schedule. However, the surrounding circumstances may warrant temporary adjustments. It is important to adhere to existing agreements as much as possible. Parents are free, however, to make temporary changes in consultation with the other parent. During a full lockdown, children should strictly remain with the parent who holds their primary residence. Beyond that, arrangements largely depend on the child and the parents’ willingness to cooperate and be flexible.
If a decision is made to temporarily suspend the visitation schedule, it is important to provide an alternative form of contact. If using video calls, it may help to schedule multiple sessions per day. The key is to adapt to the child’s age and needs. The younger the child, the more challenging video calls become. For example, a parent could read a book, sing a song, or play a game via video call. For older children, especially those attending school, video calls are easier and can even be used to assist with schoolwork.
Of course, not all parents cooperate smoothly, and reaching mutually acceptable adjustments may not be straightforward. Parents may also interpret government regulations differently. In such cases, one parent may insist on relying on government rules and simply maintain that the visitation schedule cannot take place temporarily. Unfortunately, there is little the other parent can do. Covid-19 inevitably causes stress and uncertainty. In such cases, it may be wise to accept the temporary suspension of the schedule. Keep in mind that the situation can quickly change, and this is not a permanent modification. Flexibility is key, in the best interest of the child(ren), and communication should continue.
Always remember that children do not need extra stress. In other words, even temporarily acquiescing to the unreasonable demands of an ex-partner may be in the child’s best interest. Conversely, if you are the parent keeping the children at home, it is important to continue facilitating contact between the children and the other parent. Be generous and try to compensate for the time the children are not with the other parent.
Ideally, parents take each other and the children’s safety into account. If you need further information or would like to discuss the situation with a sparring partner, you can contact me at eisden@true-lawyers.com. I will provide guidance to help prevent further conflicts.